The Good News: A Letter to Santa 2024

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By Ann Modlin, December 11, 2024

Dear Santa:

With a new administration taking over in January, changes are sure to happen. Change can be scary, but I’m an eternal optimist. As a result, I’ve decided to go big this year. Here’s what I’d like for Christmas:

1. An end to numerical redundancy.

There is absolutely no need to ever write out a number and put the numeral in parentheses. This is what I’m talking about – ten (10); forty (40); seventy-five (75). Please make it stop, Santa. The easy rule is that numbers are written out one through ten (or nine, depending on your style guide), and numerals are used for 11 and up.

2. A budget from Congress.

I’m pretty sure I ask for this every year. Despite what some people think, the Federal government does a lot of good things. It takes money to do those good things. Federal employees should not have to worry about funding every single year! Congress needs to pass a budget now!

3. Help supervisors and advisors understand the burdens of proof are low for disciplinary and performance actions.

To discipline an employee, the agency must show that, more likely than not, the employee engaged in misconduct and that the penalty was reasonable — just 51%.

To remove a poor performer, the agency must show that any reasonable person might (not “would”) agree that the employee performed at an unacceptable level — just +/- 40%.

Easy as pie! (Speaking of pie, let’s add an apple pie to this list.)

4. Simplification of probationary and trial periods.

The probationary or trial period is a magical timeframe during which agencies may terminate Federal employees for unacceptable performance or misconduct without the due process rights that attach after that period. It should be simple to know who is a probationary employee and who is not, but sadly, it can be very complicated. Perhaps the new Congress and Administration could go to work on simplifying the language about probationary and trial periods in the U.S. Code. And heck, why not just make an across-the-board two-year probationary period for all competitive service and excepted service employees? This would take away some of the confusion. (I told you I’m going big this year).

5. Simplification of the Federal EEO process.

Santa, please don’t laugh at this one. The process is overly complicated, and I’m not sure it really helps remedy illegal discrimination. And EEOC Administrative Judges are completely overloaded. How about a pilot program with one agency trying the EEO system used by the private sector. Here’s how it works:

  • The employee has 180 days to file a complaint with the EEOC.
  • The EEOC notifies the agency of the complaint within ten days of receiving the complaint.
  • The EEOC offers voluntary mediation.
  • The EEOC has 180 days to investigate the claims, and the agency may submit a written response to the complaint.
  • If the EEOC does not complete its investigation within 180 days, the employee has a right to sue in Federal district court.
  • If the EEOC completes the investigation within 180 days, the EEOC can decide to sue on behalf of the employee or dismiss the complaint and give the employee a notice of right to file suit in Federal district court within 90 days.

This process works for private-sector employers. Why not give it a shot for the Federal government?? (Yep – I’m going big!)

6. Limit collective bargaining agreements to 150 pages.

I sense you may be laughing at this one too. No one wants to read hundreds of pages in a collective bargaining agreement.

7. A horse.

I have asked for a pony for many years, and no luck so far. In the spirit of going big, I would like a horse.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, Santa! [email protected]

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